


Goodnight

by ashleyy15



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Character Death, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-28
Updated: 2013-11-28
Packaged: 2018-01-02 21:40:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1061946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ashleyy15/pseuds/ashleyy15
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"To the people living within the walls, the members of the Survey Corps are people were a strange bunch who weren’t scared of dying. A smile could always be found on their faces, despite the constant deaths that come with their expeditions. Everyone outside the Survey Corps thought each of them were strange, showing bravery even when others were dying all the time. But that was their job. Behind closed doors, tears would come and fear would overtake for the night."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodnight

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the terrible English! It's not exactly my first language :)

To the people living within the walls, the members of the Survey Corps are people were a strange bunch who weren’t scared of dying. A smile could always be found on their faces, despite the constant deaths that come with their expeditions. Everyone outside the Survey Corps thought each of them were strange, showing bravery even when others were dying all the time.

     But that was their job.

     Behind closed doors, tears would come and fear would overtake for the night. There, in the quarters of squad leader Hanji, was the scientist who always showed insanity on the outside. Out of everyone else’s view, she sat at the edge of her bed, leaning against the concrete wall. Her hair was out of her ponytail and a total mess. Her glasses were pushed up above her forehead as she stared at the wall, opposite of her room.

     The constant smile on her face was gone as she pulled her knees up to her chest. No matter how many times she had seen titans killing her fellow comrades, she could never shake off the fear as night came. Though they camped within the walls, anxiety always found some way to crawl up her skin. 

      Her mind drifted to a few hours before, when she thought her best friend was going to die. To her, Levi was one of the most-skilled soldiers she knew, so the sight of him being so close to his death made her froze in her spot. His gas ran out at that unfortunate moment, if it wasn’t for the commander’s quick thinking, Levi would have died and Hanji didn’t know how she would ever get over that.

     _What about next time? What happens if he dies in the next expedition?_

She tried not to think about that. Levi had high chances of surviving, but that little ‘what if’ kept lingering in her thoughts. She hid her face as she pulled her knees tighter against her chest; the tears that followed were inevitable. Her shoulders shook as she silently cried in her own chambers, hoping no one would walk in right then and catch her crying.

     “Could you stop crying? I’m right next door, I can hear you!” A familiar voice barked.

     Hanji quickly looked up, not really surprised to find Levi standing a few feet away from her bed. His footsteps were always silent, Hanji wasn’t surprised if he had witnessed her whole break down. Levi softened his glare when he felt a little sympathy for the scientist. He’d never seen her panic like she did hours ago, before. Usually she would be more composed, keeping a smile on her face even as she took down titan after titan. He still found it hard to believe that she froze just because he was in danger.

     “Why aren’t you sleeping yet?” Levi asked the brunette.

     She gave him a sheepish smile and placed her glasses back where it sat on the bridge of her nose. “Sorry, I was just...you know.”

     “Would me dying really be that horrible?” He asked, raising an eyebrow as he sat down on the edge of her bed. The mattress creaked under his weight and Hanji shifted a little.

     “Yeah, of course it is...”

     Levi glanced at Hanji, surprised. He didn’t expect a truthful answer. He felt guilty for making her worried and it would be his fault if a certain scientist didn’t get proper sleep. “You should get some sleep,” he said as he slowly took off her glasses and placed it on the bed side.

     Hanji didn’t like arguing with him so she complied and took off her jacket which Levi grabbed and folded before placing at the foot of her bed. ‘ _Always the neat freak_ ,’ Hanji thought to herself. _‘But he’s my neat freak.’_  Soon, she was laying on her bed, feeling her eyelids getting heavy as sleep approached.

     Levi was just getting up to leave when he felt Hanji tugging at his sleeve. “Could you...could you erm...stay until I fall asleep?” Levi sighed, deciding that he might as well wait a bit longer. He pulled a stool from her study desk and sat next to her bed. The moonlight shone through the velvet drapes, illuminating his face.

     “You look really pretty now, Levi.”

     “Could you just shut up and sleep?”

     Hanji grinned, enjoying how Levi was obviously trying to hide his embarrassment. “Promise to come back from the expedition tomorrow and I’ll sleep,” she said, followed by a yawn.

     “Tsk. I’m not dying before you, shitty glasses.”

     That was all she needed to hear. “Goodnight, Levi.” She managed to let out before sleep took her.

     Levi waited a moment before he reached for her hand.

     “Goodnight, Hanji.”

\--

 

“Arlert, have you seen Hanji?” Levi asked, getting worried by then. He had questioned five soldiers as he ran to find said person. He figured that the blonde would know her location since he was the tactician and all, but when Armin shook his head; Levi felt something sinking in his gut.

     “Never mind,” Levi growled before continuing his search. She was nowhere near her team, so where could she be?

     All of a sudden, Levi stopped running and just froze in his spot. Though his expression remained stoic, he could feel his heart racing. He could see someone laying on the ground a few feet away. Who else had brown hair that’s tied in a ponytail? Who else pushed their glasses up above their forehead when they cried? He only knew of one person, the girl who silently worried over everyone.

     “Oi, Hanji!” He tried sounding brave as he approached. His feet were starting to betray him, and soon he found himself kneeling beside her. She wasn’t dead, not yet. But he could see her life fading away by the second. He felt something caught in his throat as he slowly reached for her limped hand.

     “Y-you’re alive!” The brunette croaked, a weak grin crossed her face as she took in Levi’s face one last time.

     “Y-yeah, I told you I won’t die before you, didn’t I?” He felt himself panicked when Hanji’s hand dropped from his own. “You’re going to be fine, Hanji.” Levi didn’t know who’s sake he was saying it for. Though the rational part of him already knew she wouldn’t make it, he still couldn’t bear to leave her like that.

     “Hey!”

     “What?” Levi looked at her, surprised.

     “You called me by my name, no nicknames!” She looked so happy, Levi could feel a smile slipping onto his own face.

     But it left as quickly as it came. Hanji broke into a coughing fit, splattering blood onto her chest. Levi forced himself to not cry, to not show any signs of sadness. Even in front of a dying Hanji, he wanted her to remember him as a brave friend of hers.

     “I-I’m scared of...dying.”

     Levi gripped her hand tighter. “Close your eyes.” He gave the final order that Hanji would ever hear. Slowly, after memorizing Levi’s face one last time, her eyelids dropped and her breath grew shallow. Just right after her eyes closed, Levi allowed his tears to fall. He made sure to kiss each eyelid before scooping her up into his arms. “Goodnight, Hanji.”

     He never got a response. His best friend died in his arms, and he couldn’t even do anything about it.

     _Death is fearsome, but inevitable. It’s an endless sleep, but also an endless rest._

Levi could just imagine hearing the wind whisper back to him, “Goodnight, Levi.” 


End file.
